Cephalon Cordylon 21

Originally posted 05 Jan 2016.

Zephyrzay asks: How does a cephalon celebrate the festive season?
Cephalon have no need for celebration, but it is understood that organic life forms frequently enjoy distracting themselves from their mortality and imminent demise with a wide range of celebratory occasions. As participation in these events helps improve morale, I always stay prepared for any potential celebrations by keeping appropriate festive subroutines on standby.

These celebratory statements and actions include:

  • "Congratulations on another year of existence."
  • "A reminder: excessive consumption of mood-altering substances can lead to intense sickness."
  • "Please enjoy this seasonally correct and visually accurate representation of festive imagery."

The final statement is normally followed by a holographic image of confetti, streamers, and flashing lights. I have learned not to perform such an action around Tenno that feel particularly attached to Mirage, as it has encouraged an unintended response in the past.

Morec0 asks: I'm certain that the colonists have attempted, and likely continue to attempt, self-defence against the Grineer or Corpus throughout their history. What sort of weapons have they used or even made to defend themselves?
Even well-prepared colonists likely do not have an appropriate defense that could withstand a premeditated Grineer or Corpus invasion, but there have been reports of some colonies surviving such attacks through unconventional means.

The most frequent come from colonists that have enlisted the help of freelance mercenaries or Syndicates such as Steel Meridian. These deadly firefights still see casualties, but raids are expected on settlements unfortunate enough to catch the attention of the Grineer Empire. Corpus engagements can often be negotiated before coming to violence, but these contracts are rarely mutually beneficial for both parties.

A rare exception is the reported instance of a Corpus Hostile Investigation Unit that was held back by a single juvenile colonist. Description of the incident from HIU informants is unclear, but the core of the report focuses around several handmade booby-traps that caused serious injuries, preventing the team from performing a full sweep of the area.

Snowmotion asks: Knowledgeable Cordylon, were you in possession of the capability to physically taste, of the various dishes and desserts on offer across our solar system, could you share the ones you believe would be most agreeable to you?
There are many dishes across our solar system that could fall under the definition of 'Agreeable' due to the general appreciation for their base ingredients. Many of these prepared meals range widely depending on local tastes, but there are a few that stand out:

  • Boiled Martian Oasis Jellyfish, dusted with a blend of Earth spices, served over the finest solar-enriched vegetation.
  • The Corpus-created Nutritional Flavour Bar is well known amongst Crewmen for its marketing slogan: 'Sustain yourself with nourishment.'
  • Kubrow Flank, fried or burned. This is one of two 'recipes' that can be found in Grineer logs under 'edible objects.'

An Avid Fisherman asks: Where can I purchase a weapon that's both practical in combat, but also excellent for catching the occasional wild carp on Earth?
Any tool that can serve multiple purposes reliably is one to be admired, and I am pleased to announce that Tenno should have access to such a weapon within the next lunar cycle. While effective against wildlife, I am inclined to warn Operators against using such a weapon for hunting wildlife larger than the size of a regulation Landing Craft.

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